Donate search
close

Share

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • send Email
  • print Print

April Fool’s 2019 Was an Epic Fail

I hate April Fool’s Day.

I hate practical jokes. They’re stupid. They’re mean. People get injured. I detest the whole “Borat” genre where he tricks people into saying things that end their careers and wreck their lives (hello, Jason Spencer.)

In the past, some media outlet would prank the public, naive people would fall for it, and then they’d get angry at the pranksters. But this year, something has changed about April Fool’s: this year people were mad because the hoaxes WEREN’T real.

April Fool’s Day (and I’m just going to start abbreviating it as AFD here) used to be the bailiwick of radio DJ’s. Now, it’s all handled by the social media departments of major corporations. But how do you come up with any joke so ludicrous that it couldn’t be real? I can just imagine the pitch meetings:

“So, we need to come up with something clever for April Fool’s this year. Any ideas?”

“We could say that we’re going to stop selling hamburgers in order to fight global warming!”

“Yeah, the Democrats already beat you to it.”

“We could set up a fake insurance company that covers every possible health care emergency. But the joke is that no doctors will accept it.”

“Sounds too much like Obamacare.”

“We could get some reality TV star to Tweet out that he’s running for president?”

“Get out of my office.”

Yes, we have truly entered the Twilight Zone (recently rebooted by CBS) when you can’t think up anything more absurd than our current reality. The old classics like spaghetti trees, left handed Whoppers and Taco Bell buying the Liberty Bell have already been done. But corporate America gave it a good go yesterday.

Sodastream takes home the gold medal with it’s fake commercial featuring Astronaut Scott Kelly. The product advertised would allow people to convert their own personal gas into carbonation.

Wonder if AOC saw this and if she did, did her staff have to stop her from endorsing it?

Maybe it’s just me, but as I was looking at these yesterday, I kept thinking “Someone would actually buy that if it were real.”

Pet weddings? I think they’re an actual thing now:

Tell me people wouldn’t buy this:

Wholesome dating app? Sign me up!

Height verification on Tinder? People would definitely pay extra for that.

But this is the one I really want:

I can see people buying the Halo Top ice cream face masks, the Roku remote for dogs and the gender reveal mozzarella sticks. Heck, I want to Dunkin Donuts holder!

Now my cat wants to do this:
https://www.rei.com/blog/travel/rei-introduces-adventures-for-pets


Apparently, some of these fake products were so appealing, people became outraged that they WEREN’T real. A lot of people would actually eat a McDonald’s all pickle burger.

And dog people were hacked off that dogs won’t really be part of the US Open. But of all the pranks that weren’t real, this one disappointed me the most:

I say we just need to cancel AFD next year. Because if Donal Trump Tweets out that he’s resigning, then follows it up by Tweeting “April Fool’s!” there may be mass suicide in the mainstream media.

Share

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • send Email
  • print Print

Advertisement

More Top Stories

Has the Absurdity of Transgenderism Started to Awaken the West?

On an ordinary day I would have regarded what Indiana State Attorney General Curtis Hill did as an aberration, a stroke of common sense in a society waging war against it.  Hill refused to enact …

Great White Dork

Canada’s prime minister Justin Trudeau gets caught brown-handed.

LIVE: The Erick Erickson Show